BEWARE. LONG RANTINGS.

Did I not mention 101 times that the fastest way for my internal landmines to go off is to take me and my actions for granted? Seriously, if whatever landmines that went off had an equivalent Richter value of 3, this must be at least 7-8. But of course, its severity is probably due to the fact that I've never experienced such levels before, or probably, because the tolerance limit has been unnecessarily extended due to personal ties. Whatever the reason is, being the avengeful me, obviously I'd get back at the person responsible for this explosion. But I really had to admire this person for her ability to set this record. Before stating my opinions, let me just provide the scenarios, and you guys tell me, how would you react if you were in my shoes, and whether she deserves to be in my condemn list? And yes, I'm someone who remembers unresolved issues, but so what? And let's just steal yuan yuan chun's copyright, and call her "that woman".

The scenarios stretched from 4.5 months ago, till today.

Issue 1:
Some time in mid Oct. Saturday.
That woman came over with my bro. She realized that she couldn't close the blinds because I had hung my chio pixie wind chime in the way. Admittedly, I didn't realize that mistake until they came over, because I never had the habit of leaving the blinds closed. After all, what are windows for, when you have them covered all day? Anyway, without my consent, that woman took a chair, reached out for the wind chime and tried to untie it. Because that woman didn't expect that I didn't tie it tightly, the wind chime fell and broke. Not a word of apology or any sign of remorse from that woman till today. But that woman did a pretty good job of fixing it with epoxy, so I silently let it pass by telling myself to forget it since it's really an accident despite what the initial cause was. By the way, that is my favourite wind chime, which I specially bought before coming over from Madison. It was only up a few days ago. I'm sure my bro noticed that unspoken sadness in my eyes when I picked up the broken wind chime. And yes, I was really glad that I didn't tell that woman I had a glue gun (cos I forgot that I had one when I moved), which dries up instantly as opposed to epoxy which takes 5 min. That woman got so vexed over fixing the chime.

Issue 2:
That woman and my bro came over about 6-7 times, and each time I let them take the better bedding asset. Twice, before I had my bed shipped, I willingly sleep on the carpet while they take the air mattress. When my bed finally came, I let them take the bed, and I take the air mattress because I wanted them to experience the bed which I had spent more than USD 700 on. Before I continue, may I first ask, how many of you would offer your bed to others (less parents and like), and take on the worse alternative? No, not a word of thanks from that woman at all, while I could see my bro appreciative of what I had done, and yes he said "thank you". I did the same thing to my 2 friends who visited me, and they were like so hesitant, but in the end, I insisted, and they were thankful.

Issue 3:
That woman insisted that there must be hand towels in the kitchen and bathroom, something which I never used at all. But this is minor, because I agreed with my bro's reason that guests (ie only them) may need to use them. So I got those towels. But the thing I minded was she's trying to change MY apartment to her liking, and I had to pay for the expenses. Again, not a bit of appreciation from that woman.

Issue 4:
Built on issue 3, that woman also insisted that the floor should have towels so that the toilet can remain dry. I totally don't see the need for it, but I still got a toilet rug (at my expense), which I now converted to my exercise mat and placed in front of the sink, instead of just outside the tub. Does it matter if the floor is a little wet? And who is she to determine what I have in the toilet or how's my toilet like? I may probably lay a rug at the tub whenever she comes if she had bought it for me. And I stress, she buys it, not my bro. Blardy backbone-less woman, everything live off my bro and whine like a pussy cat after that on every possible thing. I think I only saw once that she paid for a meal, because my bro had to go away to buy something else. And yesterday, I think (may be wrong) I heard the most cock comment that she made:" The floor's wet, so she cannot shower." WTF?!!!

Issue 5:
On two occasions, I specially stayed up late till 2am the night before and made bak changs and chicken feet for that woman and my bro to try. Admittedly those are the first few times I tried, and it really wasn't that good. Yes, that woman was encouraging enough to just have one piece, stopped and complained she's hungry when my bro and I were busy eating the chicken feet. Of course, I can still remember that woman's familiar disapproving face. So much for the efforts. At least my bro finished all the chicken feet with me, even though it's really not that good. I was touched by that. I thought the japanese is the more polite breed? From that time onward, I never ever made my best dishes for her again, simply because she does not deserve to eat my cooking. She wouldn't find it good anyway, given her picky tongue which doesn't like saltiness, sweetness, spiciness and oiliness. I think just give her plain rice will do.

Issue 6:
This is probably the most dramatic one that triggered the explosion, which really didn't explode at the time of cause. Remember issue 2 when I let them take the bed? I initially wanted to let them try one or two times just to experience the bed, since I paid so much for it. After that, it continued because I wanted my bro to have a good night's rest since he's the one always driving down 5 hrs each way every few weeks (and I only went up once). The last few times, I was a little hesitant already, because I didn't want that woman to take the bed! She totally doesn't deserve it after all that she did, especially not being appreciative of the sacrifice of beds. But each time, I relented in the end, because I want my bro to have the bed, since he deserves it, and that by-product stood to gain.

So the day before yesterday, like the past, I was still hesitant about giving up my bed, but I decided to just pump up the air mattress first before deciding. since the weather has turned cold (6 deg), and it would be cold to sleep in the living room. The bedroom is smaller and it has a heater, so it would be more ideal to squeeze both beds in the bedroom. The first question that woman asked was something like "Why are you pumping it here (bedroom)? You should do it outside."I told her the reason on the weather and joked:"It's my bed what, I paid for it, so why shall I let you sleep on it. You can take the air mattress tonight." Immediately that woman kept quiet. I almost flared up on this on and it was really hard to contain my flare and squeeze out that joke.

Why? For one, that woman she already assumed that she'll be taking the bed when I haven't really decided yet. For two, that woman wanted me to sleep in the cold living room so that that woman and my bro could take the bedroom to themselves just like the past few times. When said I could share the heater in the bedroom, that woman said she never sleeps with heater on. I think that woman is a little confused about whose bed it is, whose apartment it is and who's the owner and the guest. Or perhaps she already has taken for granted that she'll take the bed since she's a girl. Do I care whether she's a girl or not? Initially I give her that privilege, but after so many things, she has long lost that privilege. Of course, I should mention that she was whining all the while about the air mattress not set up and she wanted to sleep. NATO again. If she wants something quick, she had better do it herself, not whine! And that doesn't help if I had to personally set up everything in exchange for her assumption that I should sleep outside on the air mattress, while she take the bed.

You think that's bad? The worst is yet to come. The next night, she was whining at 10.30pm for my bro to go sleep. 10.30pm! (She's just whining because she doesn't want to play the wii game which we gladly welcomed her to.) Of course, we ignored her and that dragged till 12.30am, and only 12.30am. Then she suddenly got angry because my bro didn't want to sleep, and went into the bedroom and threw the mattress, and all my bedding stuff, out into the cold living room. Thanks huh. That really reached the limits of my extended tolerance. If that woman wasn't my bro's fiancee, I would have flared up long ago. Now that I recall, I really admire my tolerance of everything. At least, I didn't walk up and give her one tight slap and forbid her from taking the bed. I really have nothing much to say on this one. I always thought that such things would happen only in dramas and between COUPLES only or mother-daughter-in-laws, when the daughter is the one in charge! I have never seen a case where the guest overthrows an owner before even in dramas! And no, no apology from that woman or any sense of remorse. More of anger felt.

So, these are the scenarios, and I really find them amusing, because I never had anyone around me who is like that before. I probably should not ask guests to "make yourself at home" so readily, because some guests will REALLY make themselves very at home. Well, these are my personal issues with that woman. And I really don't see anything attractive about that woman.

That woman:
(1) doesn't look cute,
(2) is hot tempered,
(3) picky about food and things,
(4) doesn't do anything,
(5) loves to whine,
(6) not humourous,
(7) damn boring to hang out with (she wants to leave the moment the group enters a place she's not interested in),
(8) stubborn,
(9) loves to exercise control over others,
(10) loves to win and gets angry when she can't,
(11) self-centred,
(12) never appreciative of other people's efforts,
(13) wants things done her way
(14) easily jealous over meaningless stuff
(15) double-standards.

Not a very huge list, and at least we can still tell ourselves to look at her good side.
(1) She can cook, but really doesn't cook well.
(2) She has a good GK, which many others also possess.
(3) She does things for my bro (only). I have nothing much to say on this one. She initially helps to clean the dishes for me, but no longer, even when I had to prepare the food, I had to wash up everything after that. She doesn't make the bed like I did when I was taking the living room in my bro's place (when she's still there), or like my stay in Japan. Making the bed means putting the pillows, sheets and comforter back into the cupboard for storage since she's leaving. She leaves cups everywhere and doesn't wash them after use. She doesn't wash the bowls after using them for her own breakfast. She wants the bed but doesn't want to help set it up. She wants to play wii, but doesn't want to help set up. She whines about dinner, but doesn't want to help setting the table.
(4) She's good at art and fixing wind chimes.
(5) Resourceful, but in a limited way.

Well, this is merely my personal opinion of that woman based on what I see and experienced. And of course, the honour I bestowed for the current her, is the same the one yuan yuan chun had for his "that woman". But of course, I'm more forgiving than yuan yuan chun. If she would change her foul temper and attitude, I would consider taking her out of this condemn list which consists of only one data. But of course, things are more complicated than yuan yuan chun's cos family ties are involved. I don't like her doesn't mean that everyone else should dislike her. She really is not bad if you don't have to spend more than half a day with her. But for me, I'd probably downgrade her to those most superficial conversation, if any is needed at all. The problem lies with her, and in the least, she has to learn to say "thank yous" and "sorry" and NOT GET ANGRY each time we meet. I think the only "thank you" I ever got from her was today when she asked for tea, and I'm not sure if it is even my bro's reminder in the car. But like I said, I will forgive and forget if she changes. What I condemn, is her current set of values, not her future set of values. After all, God wants us to be forgiving of others, isn't it? Would you also condemn a person like that if that person throws you out of the bedroom as if she's the owner?

Last but not least, I had to admire my bro's tolerance of her. And from what I see, I somehow got a feeling that she doesn't know my bro even after several years of living together. It seems to me that she doesn't know what my bro wants, she doesn't know what makes my bro happy, and what makes my bro upset. The fact that my bro had to asked her whether she like the food 5 times each meal, shows how hard it is to gauge her eating preference. And as a bystander, I find it super retarded for a couple to do that. I wish I could tell her all that, so that my bro will be happier, and I can even simplify it into 5 words - "Give and Thou Shalt Receive". It really is my bro's happiness that I'm worried about; I don't really care about that woman's for now, but happiness do come hand in hand for a couple.

Oh well, that's all about my rantings. After all, the steam has to leak through some channels for dissipation if it's not directed at the cause. I was just stating my stand and my answer for the things that happened. But I wonder what happens if I tell my parents and grandma that she wanted to throw me out of my own bedroom when I offered the bed to her. I won't say for now, but if she continues to take me for granted, I'm not sure what I'll do if I really get mad. Maybe, I'll just give her one tight slap and tell her to wake up her idea. :P

Anyway, I shall reiterate. I hate people who take me for granted, people who always get angry for stupid reasons and people who seriously whine (as opposed to jokingly) without taking actions. Don't be one of them if you're my friend.

~ciao